September 18, 2008 - January 24, 2010
9 minutes (Average)
Number of episodes:
26; 1 Special
Hard Justice is a Machinima project created by Jon CJG, who at the time went under the alias "DigitalPh33r". Its promotional trailer was released on YouTube on September 20, 2008.
Bernard Brown is the starring character, an ex-cop who resigns from the police department of Regent City after deciding he doesn't want to be a part of or contribute to the fact that Regent City is slowly becoming a fascist police state. Unfortunately for him, Esoteria is not much of a difference. After failing to get a job, Bernard finds a job at E.R.E.C.T, or Eradication of Repulsive Evil and Corruption Team. Despite having a dark theme, it still contains plenty of DigitalPh33r's trademark humor.
The episode begins with Max Dangerfield and Edward "Eddie" Stryker breaching the door of a house. Max tells Eddie to steel himself for the coming task. Eddie decides to open the door, but Max tells him "Don't split hairs with me. Why go around something when you can go through it", and blasts open the door with his rocket launcher. Entering the house, Max discovers that the occupant of the house has downloaded three tracks of music, causing Eddie to puke violently. Just then, the occupant of the house returns, and he is placed under arrest by Max, who tells him that downloading three tracks is equivalent to killing three people. Eddie then fires at the "offender", who flees. Max blows up his car. After failing to catch him, they taser him twice and restrain him. In the meantime, Bernard arrives at Esoteria airport, and after clearing the numerous security checkpoints, getting stopped at each of them for being nervous. He sees some job offers, one for the police force and one for a full-time dishwasher at Reggie's bar and grill. Back at the E.R.E.C.T. office, Howard (the chief of E.R.E.C.T) compliments Eddie and Max on their good work at handling a dangerous criminal. The "dangerous criminal" talks to another arrested citizen, who states that his reason for arrest was assault on a police officer. However, this assault was simply farting at a 25-cent toll booth, and was deemed as "using chemical weapons to avoid paying a 25-cent toll". A call then comes in, for a carjacking outside Reggie's bar and grill.
At Reggie's bar and grill, Bernard undergoes an interview for a dishwasher's job, which he is unexpectedly denied. Meanwhile, a citizen is carjacked right outside the bar. As he screams for help, the carjacker keeps crashing while trying to turn the car. The victim then explains to the carjacked that his hideout was the other way. Fortunately, Bernard walks out of Reggie's right that moment and jacks the carjacker, then incapacitates him. The grateful citizen thanks Bernard and leaves. As he leaves, Eddie and Max arrive. Max prepares to blast the leaving car with his rocket launcher, but Bernard shoves him aside, causing him to miss. After explaining the situation, Max is unable to comprehend, and tells Eddie to "Taser everyone", which Eddie does. Back at the E.R.E.C.T. office, Howard questions Bernard. Upon learning that he is an ex-cop, he tries to persuade Bernard to join the force. Bernard declines, as the main reason he left Regent City in the first place was to avoid contributing to a fascist police state, but he now realizes Esoteria was about the same thing. Bernard then leaves the office. Eddie follows him, and convinces Bernard to give the force a second chance.
In the E.R.E.C.T. office, Howard is skimming through police transmissions for "important" cases. He skips a homicidal killer chase, an officer's call for rescue after getting stuck under his car on a railway track while pursuing a man driving a tank into a residential area, and a homicide case, dismissing them all as "petty crimes". He then picks up a case on Washington Avenue, of a person turning his music up way too loud. He dispatches Eddie and Max to deal with it, but as they leave, they bump into Bernard, who came back to the E.R.E.C.T. office to take the job. Bernard then decides that Max should go to Washington Avenue, while he and Eddie check out the homicide. At the homicide scene, they bump into the house landlord, who tells them that he came in that morning and found the victim with no limbs or head at all. He then asked him for his rent, not realizing he was dead. He called the police only when he didn't respond (because he was dead). When asked by Bernard if he realized that the victim was dead and would not respond, he replied "How would I know, I'm not a doctor". Eddie speculates that it was a suicide, but Bernard argues that it would be physically impossible to either a) Cut off your legs, one arm, somehow cut off the other arm, and then the head with no limbs at all, or b) Cut off your head, then cut off all your limbs without a head. Just then, Bernard is contacted by Howard, who requests him to return to the office. Bernard leaves Eddie to investigate the "stump" of a body while he returns to the office. Eddie asks if he should scan the house for semen, to which Bernard replies "why the hell not?". Meanwhile, Max arrives at Washington Avenue, and after hurling a grenade into the occupant's house, he barges in and tells him at rocket-launcher-point to turn his music down. Back at the E.R.E.C.T. office, Howard informs Bernard that his Regen City driving license is invalid in Esoteria, and that his driving back and forth from the crime scene was illegal. Bernard has to take another driving test. Eddie calls back and tells Bernard that after scanning the body under UV light, he discovered that it was covered with semen. Bernard replies that the body is covered in blood, which shows up under UV light, while semen does not, and puts down angrily. Back at the crime scene, Eddie realizes something, and mutters, "Yep. He's dead."
In the morning, Bernard comes in the office, and stumbles upon Howard, who is begging for gold on Runescape. Annoyed by his stupidity, Bernard asks about Eddie and Max's whereabouts. He then proceeds to the lab, where they are. He discovers that Eddie is also playing Runescape, together with Howard. Max then appears, having got off the phone with his girlfriend. Bernard is extremely annoyed, saying "This department is a fucking gong show". Eddie tells him to relax. Bernard then states that he had recovered the homicide body the other day, with they had completely forgotten about. Eddie comments on the "suicide". Max informs them that the case was closed with direct orders from the governor. Bernard tells them to identify the body, to which Eddie tells him is impossible, due to the lack of a head. Bernard tells Max to use a DNA test to find out who the person is. Bernard then leaves for his driving test, with Eddie driving him due to Bernard's lack of an Esoteria license. Eddie brags about never getting into an accident in his entire life, and proceeds to smash into an oncoming car at an intersection. Bernard yells at the driver about his speed, calling him "Marty McFly" and "Captain Falcon". They finally arrive at the Esoteria driving center, where Bernard meets the driver again. Bernard questions him on why he is following him, to which the driver responds "I'm a driving instructor, I work here. I have an appointment with someone at one o'clock." Bernard realizes that the guy is HIS driving instructor for the day, and mutters "Oh shit."
Governor Roman Drake contacts Howard and reprimands him for his disobedience of a direct order. Howard informs him that it was Bernard that told Max to run the DNA tests. Roman decides to come over to see Bernard personally. Unfortunately, Bernard is not back from his driving test yet. Meanwhile, Bernard proceeds with the trivial driving test, with the angry driving instructor that he crashed into earlier. After the test, through which Bernard continually insulted him, the instructor reveals that he was the father of the person arrested for downloading three songs in the first episode, and that the conception of driving companies "milking people of money" was wrong, as the police force had arrested his son for a ridiculous reason and he had to pay his bail. Bernard then tells him that he had left the police force once, and that he was different from Eddie and Max. He then gets his license and goes back. At the E.R.E.C.T Office, Bernard is greeted by Roman Drake, who then tells him that if he steps out of line and disobeys Drake's orders again, he will suffer. Drake then leaves. Bernard then confronts Howard, still playing Runescape, calling him a "Spineless fuck" and telling him that Drake was wasting the unit's time with trivial jobs because he had something to hide, inferring that Drake could be part of Twisted Coercion.
The episode begins with Bernard arriving to work; only to find Eddie failing a burnout. Eddie explains that he's trying to re-create something done on TV. Bernard tells him nobody actually does it, but Eddie tells him, "Oh, it's okay, I've seen it done on TV," which makes Bernard angry. A second later, Bernard sees Max crash into Bernard's car. He goes into the office, and sees a word document up written by Howard that is titled "Top 10 Guys I would date If I were Gay." Howard tells Bernard to stop looking at his work, which includes "over 100 tabs of YouTube" and two emulations of Super Mario 64. Howard tells Bernard there are no crimes today, because the radio isn't on, but no crime transmissions show up, so Bernard goes into the lab, and starts up a study on the mutilated body. Eddie comes in and is told by Bernard what he's doing. Eddie reminds him that he isn't supposed to, but they argue. Bernard tells him that whoever did this needs to be stopped, and doesn't care if he tells Howard. Eddie calls Howard to call that him and Bernard are going out to pizza. Howard gets a call that there is a disturbance at the shopping mall. Max comes in with a Battle Rifle, and Howard puts Max on the case, but Max tells him that he "has a sale on Battle Rifle rounds, 36 for the price of justice," with the BR pointed at Howard's head, but Howard does nothing. Bernard and Eddie follows a signal to a strip joint, who believe they found the killer.
Howard is rudely awakened from his sleep (and a dream involving him and Master Chief in an intense romantic moment) by a call from Roman Drake, who demands to know what's going on in his office. Howard tells him that he is doing work, but Roman tells him that he didn't know word documents made Halo 3 sounds (as Howard was playing Halo 3 at his desk, an obvious contributing fact that brought on his dream). Howard quickly covers it up by yelling "Eddie, turn it down!" and framing Eddie for it, but is quickly caught in the act when Roman reminds him that he can see him on CCTV surveillance. Roman then demands to know where Max, Eddie and Bernard (in particular) are and what they are doing. Meanwhile, Bernard and Eddie arrive at the Esoteria Gentleman's Club, and Eddie comments that "I don't see any gentlemen around here". Bernard and Eddie find the suspect, who is having a private session with one of the girls. Interrupting him, Bernard questions him about the murder, but he denies that he had anything to do with it. He then leaves to use the washroom, but Bernard does not follow him because he has a lock on the man's ID tag. The man at the bar, who overhears the conversation, follows the suspect to the men's lavatory attacks him and then drowns him in the washbasin. The counter man then returns to his post, and Bernard continues complaining about how long the man is taking, unaware he lies dead on the men's lavatory floor.
Max arrives at the Esoteria Shopping Center after receiving a call about a disturbance in the vicinity. After an awkward greeting from the caller, Max is told that the disturbance is a man who claims to have gotten his buttocks shaved and is asking everyone to touch it, and then asks them to come to his home for some "quality time." Max confronts the man, but ends up actually going to his apartment to watch Indian in the Cupboard with him. Meanwhile, a member of Twisted Coercion tells his boss that the plan to throw Bernard off track worked, and then asks him what they should do next. Back at E.R.E.C.T. HQ, Bernard is going over the murder of Richard Parker at the Gentleman's Club to Howard, who is paying no attention to him and is instead playing Castlevania. Governor Roman then calls on speaker phone and gives Bernard a solo assignment to investigate a body that was found at the chemical plant on the other side of the city. Eddie is also given orders to head over to Reggie's Bar & Grill to deal with a vandalism report. As they get into separate jeeps, Bernard expresses that he is suspicious about these assignments, and asks Eddie to come with him. Eddie doesn't comply, thinking he will get fired, so Bernard just sighs and drives away. However, Eddie also feels that something is out of place, so he calls Reggie's Bar & Grill to confirm that vandalism report. When the owner reveals that there never was any vandalism, Eddie looks on in horror as Bernard drives off into what must surely be a trap.
Max is still at the residence of the Weird Man from the shopping center. After the movie finishes, Max decides that he should leave, but the man wants him to stay. Meanwhile, Bernard has been wandering around the chemical plant for twenty minutes and has found no one on the premises. He attempts to contact Howard, but he is too busy playing with his voice over the microphone to answer the call. Bernard finally locates somebody, but he turns out to be a member of Twisted Coersion. The man activates a system that locks all of the doors and vents poison gas throughout the building. Bernard tries to call Howard for backup, but he still doesn't answer. As Bernard tries to find an exit, he comes across Eddie, who followed him after discovering that the vandalism report was false. Bernard asks Eddie if he found a way out, but all of the doors shut behind him while he was looking for Bernard. Eddie uses his suit's visor to determine what type of gas is in the air. It turns out to be chlorine gas, so Bernard immediately begins searching for a lab in hopes of finding ammonia to counter the chlorine poisoning. They have to hurry because their suits can only filter breathable air for up to five minutes tops. After finding no ammonia, Bernard suggests they use urine-soaked tissues, for urine contains a small amount of ammonia. Eddie once again refuses to listen to him, so Bernard, anxious since they are really short on time, knocks him out.
Max feels that he should leave the Weird Man's home since now he wants to watch all eighteen discs of Sex and the City with him, which may take a few days. Back at the chemical plant, Eddie wakes up and discovers a urine-soaked rag inside his helmet, which Bernard stuffed in there while he was knocked out. The two then escape the plant by jumping down a waste disposal hatch. Eddie calls Howard, who is now playing Devil May Cry 4, for assistance. This infuriates Bernard when it turns out that Eddie's radio was working this whole time and he never used it. This leads him to determine that someone else might have remotely shut off his own radio. Bernard furiously asks Howard to send someone to pick them up, but he ignores them to fight a boss in DMC4, which makes Bernard even more angry. They choose to call Max, and he easily agrees to pick them up in order to get away from the Weird Man. Max arrives in a Jeep a few minutes later, only he brought the Weird Man with him. The Weird Man suggests to Max that they take two trips, but the E.R.E.C.T. officers choose instead to leave him behind. As they are driving away, the Weird Man yells and asks them to feel his buttocks, which makes Bernard order Max to drive faster.
An unknown killer with a Sniper rifle kills three off-duty policemen at different locations downtown, two with explosives and one with a sniper shot to the head. As chaos envelops downtown Esoteria, the unknown killer heads toward what seems to be the E.R.E.C.T office. In the meantime, Bernard Brown is in the lab drafting his resignation letter to Howard. He states in his letter he is leaving the department for his own safety. He sends the letter to Howard via email, and goes upstairs to find Howard. Howard tells Bernard that a cop-killer has killed three cops downtown, and he needs someone to go investigate as Eddie and Max are out on patrol. Bernard refuses and tells him he is resigning, and gave no notice for fear of his safety. He then leaves. As he is walking out of the office, the weird man runs in and complains to Howard that Bernard jacked him the day before(during episode 10), to which Bernard replies that it was a police unit and the weird man had no right to be inside the vehicle. Howard is on the verge of calling the police to arrest Bernard, when the weird man says that he will drop charges against Bernard if he goes with him to the Olive Garden for dinner. Bernard reluctantly agrees. Meanwhile, Eddie and Max are on patrol, and are driving at an insanely slow pace. Max asks what's the speed limit, and Eddie reads the speed limit as 4 km/h in the rear view mirror (04 km/h). Max tells him that its actually the other way round due to the mirror (40 km/h) but Eddie is adamant that it is 4 km/h. Max agrees anyway, and slows the car down even more. They then see a citizen driving his car at 40 km/h down the road in the opposite direction, and they turn around and chase him. Max pulls him over and is about to book him for traveling more than 35 km/h over the limit when a message from the mysterious cop killer is heard on the radio, addressed to "Esoteria's finest", in this case E.R.E.C.T. He tells them that he has killed the three police officers and has nowhere to run, and tells them where he resides. He then tells them that he is waiting patiently to be arrested, and the episode ends.
Bernard arrives at the restaurant where the Weird Man awaits him. When they order their meals, the Weird Man refuses to allow Bernard buy soup, as it isn't a real meal for him, and he won't drop the charges unless he takes something else. When he agrees to take something else, the Weird Man tells him he has to buy champagne as well. Meanwhile, Eddie and Max are driving to the cop killer's supposed location and arrive there shortly. Back at Olive Garden, Bernard asks the Wierd Man if he is homosexual, however, even though he might appear so, he explains that he just wants to live life to it's fullest. He then asks Bernard why he wanted to be a policeman; Bernard says he just wants to be one of the few good cops left. Changing the subject, the Weird Man asks Bernard if he heard about the simultaneous cop slaughter, which shocks him. He calls Howard, who is playing Grifball, and he explains how the cops were killed; two died from getting blown up and the third was sniped. Bernard continues and asks how the bombs were triggered; Howard explains that the first was a car bomb that was triggered by turning the engine on, and the second was a house bomb that was wired to explode if the front door was opened. Bernard asks where Eddie and Max are, so Howard tells him. Back at the killer's house, Max learns that all the other windows and doors have been barricaded shut from the inside and the front door is the only entrance. As they perform the break-in, Bernard calls Eddie. He begs him to not open the front door, since he has determined that the house is wired to explode, and leave, but its too late; Eddie's already kicked it down. Upon discovering the bombs inside, Eddie quickly turns and orders Max to run away. The bombs detonate and the house is completely destroyed, leaving Bernard with only the sound of static on his phone.
Bernard and the Weird Man are at the Esoteria General Hospital waiting to learn about Eddie and Max's condition. Bernard blames the whole situation on himself, which the Weird Man agrees to. Howard then shows up, followed by a doctor who tells Bernard that he's a father. Bernard is so confused until the doctor realizes that he got the papers mixed up. The doctor explains Eddie and Max's condition; Max suffered a severe blow to the head, while Eddie's face got burned and his shoulder dislocated. Both of them are unconscious and won't recover for a few weeks. Bernard then takes it upon himself to seek out the cop-killer and bring him to justice, with the assistance of the Weird Man. Back at E.R.E.C.T. HQ, Bernard is trying to find the location of the sniper rifle that killed one of the three cops and having no luck, but when he combines the information on the rifle with that of the explosives that killed the other two cops, he narrows it down to Esoteria Blasting and Explosives. As he and the Weird Man explore the compound, Bernard gets caught in a trap and falls through a large hole in the floor. When he recovers, he finds the Weird Man held at gun point by the killer, with the former begging Bernard to shoot the latter. Bernard and the killer argue over their morals; the killer wants to rid Esoteria of it's corrupt police unit, while Bernard just wants to save people. The killer shoots the Weird Man in the back of his head, killing him instantly, and then Bernard guns down the killer. Three weeks later, Max and Eddie have recovered and are attending a memorial to the Weird Man with Bernard. They return to HQ, where Bernard chooses to remain as a member of E.R.E.C.T., for now, as long as Howard becomes flexible when it comes to selecting cases. The team then receives a call about a cat stuck in a tree, and since there are no other cases, Bernard accepts, much to his annoyance.
Bernard continues his dangerous off-limits investigation that ended with his major lead being drowned in a strip club bathroom and Eddie reluctantly joins in. Meanwhile, Roman Drake, governor of Esoteria, revealed to be directly involved with Twisted Coercion is digging up any dirt on Bernard that he can to prove that he was the one who illegally brought down the mass cop-killer in order to send Bernard to prison as long as his power will allow.
Roman Drake interupts Max's workout to question him about the events at Esoteria Blasting and Explosives. But with no tips given to him other then the name of the mysterious man that was killed, Roman leaves Max to go out clubbing with Bernard and Eddie. But, unknown to Max, Howard drops into the bash and tags along, being invited by Bernard. Max soon tries to get with one of the club ladies, but Howard causes Max's plans to fail, with the expression of corny pickup lines and the fact that he can only square dance, much to Max's distain. Max then nags Bernard about his descion of inviting Howard to join. Eddie, seeming distant from the others the entire time, goes to be alone soon after for uknown reasons, which worry Bernard. Later on, Bernard visits the gravesight of the person that was killed when he went to investigate Esoteria Blasting and Explosives. But he is then confronted by another strange person, claiming to be the brother of the stranger. Bernard turns to him, in a deep confusion.
Eddie and Bernard are investigating the guy who appeared in episode 7 (aka. Mason Clark) but the only picture of him is blurred. Bernard decides that he would wait for him in the Gentlemen's Club. Roman Drake interrupts to asks Eddie what are they doing, Eddie says the normal things and go with Bernard but Drake goes to the computer in which Eddie was only to see the photo of the guy. Meanwhile, Max awakes in a strange place and one friendly guy says that he did Waffles and chocolate milk for him. Bernard and Eddie start to wait and the phone start to ring. Bernard does not pick it up, knowing who it was (the Weird Guy's Brother).
After Max wakes up the mysterious man's house. The man reaveals that him and Max met at the strip club and hit it off or at least he thought they did and took a bus to Canada. After Max makes the man cry he's forced out of the man's home and left without a ride. While walking he tries to use another man's car for police business but however he doesn't have his badge with him . After asking if he can at least hitch a ride with him. The man simply replies, "No, suck my balls".
Meanwhile Bernard and Eddie are just getting finshed "staking out" and Bernard drops Eddie off on the corner saying that he does not have a problem with walking home. Just then, Eddie is knocked out by an unseen figure. The next morning Bernard calls Eddie but he does not pick up but instead leaves a ridiculous voice mail. Suddenly the weird guy's brother appears and start to frustrate Bernard to no end. Just as the weird guy's brother finishes eating, Bernard begins to tell him about his brother's death. But while so the governor and Mason Clark stand and watch as he is recording what Bernard is saying.
Bernard is seen driving to the E.R.E.C.T. police station in which he was set up by Howard and Roman after Roman collected enough evidence to arrest Bernard. Meanwhile, Max, wandering the Canadian wilderness trying to find a place to eat, is attacked by a moose (whom he believes is a mutated horse of some sort as he never seen or even heard of a moose), but the moose gets shot. Max begins to talk to the shooter, which introduces himself as Dudley Punter, a professional moose hunter. While they talk, something is then heard saying gibberish in the background. As Dudley dispatches the source of the noise, Max asks if it was another moose, to which the hunter replies "No, Canucks fan. Very dangerous in this time of the year." Meanwhile, Eddie wakes up in his apartment, realizing that he was asleep for two days and heads to the station fearing he might lose his job. When he arrives at the station, Howard tells him that Bernard has been arrested. Howard then tells him that he asked Roman to assign Eddie as Bernard's prison escort. Eddie unwillingly accepts and arrives to pick up Bernard. After Bernard and Roman exchange final words, Bernard leaves with Eddie.
Bernard begins to doubt that Eddie is leading him to the prison and asks Eddie if he really is. Eddie admits that he's making a run for the Canadian border. When Bernard persuades him not to do so, he replies that "Either my career goes down the toilet or my principles do, and the latter is out of the question." They start arguing, which causes Eddie to crash into a tree. After a while of arguments, Bernard agrees to Eddie's plan.
At the same time, Roman Drake enters E.R.E.C.T. office and asks Howard if he received a call from Esoteria prison. After a moment of embarrassing silence, Roman decides to call the prison himself. After a while, he discovers that Bernard hasn't came to the prison yet. Enraged, he orders all available police units to chase Bernard and Eddie.
While they drive, Bernard reminds himself of their ID chips. Eddie calms him down, saying that his own is off and Bernard's signal is jammed by a device he smuggled from the Department's armory. Bernard then asks him how are they supposed to cross the border, to which Eddie replies that he hasn't got a plan yet.
At the Twisted Coercion HQ, Drake is administering the pursuit of the two policemen, as of then fruitless. Mason Clark offers Drake to pursue them himself. The governor initially declines, but Clark convinces him. Roman tells him "Don't fail", which Clark cuts and replies "I won't."
Twenty hours have passed since Bernard and Eddie started driving towards the border and Bernard has to use the bathroom really bad. Eddie at first decides against it, but agrees when he realizes the car is low on gas. Bernard starts walking towards the bathroom, but he starts to get out of range of the signal jammer, forcing him to embarrassingly go next to the car as people watch.
After refueling the car and driving for a little longer, the two at last reach the U.S./Canada border, but Bernard strongly suggests that they choose a line with a Canadian guard due to their friendly reputation instead of a U.S. guard. His point is made clear when a U.S. border guard accuses an ordinary citizen of being a terrorist. To avoid getting their ID chips scanned, Bernard starts a friendly conversation with the guard regarding Canadian culture. It works, but the guard won't let them into the country unless they have twenty-five pounds of Canadian bacon.
Bernard and Eddie then spend the next fourty-five minutes backtracking to a store to buy bacon and then returning to the border, finally allowing them entry into Canada. Eddie suggests that Bernard adjust his suit's temperature to keep him warm in Canada's cold climate. Bernard believes Eddie's claim to be a stereotype, only to come across a harsh blizzard the moment they enter the country.
Mason Clark and two of his men go after Bernard after finding out none of the border patrols have caught Eddie and Bernard. Bernard probes Eddie about the night at the club, but Eddie changes the by deactivating Bernard's ID chip and telling him "we should find the motel." When the duo arrives at the hotel; they attempt to get a room. The front desk clerk informs them that they can pay in cash, syrup, or maple leaves. The clerk heavily insists on paying in leaves; Bernard decides it is too troublesome and tries to go somewhere else. The clerk informs him cash is fine and that a night costs $728,592.46. The two leave.
The two that took Bernard's picture encounter Mason and his men. Mason asks the two if they have seen men matching Eddie's and Bernard's descriptions. The two decide against telling Mason anything and are interrogated on Eddie and Benard's whereabouts, and subsequently slain after informing them that they were probably headed to Canada.
Eddie and Bernard are still unable to find a place to stay. Bernard suggests building an igloo. Eddie calls the idea stupid and says they should kill each other instead. Bernard convinces Eddie and they start to make bricks. The snow is "too powdery" to work with. Eddie spots a cave and the two head inside where they are met by Max and the hunter.
Max details his account of why he is in Canada. Eddie informs Max that they are fugitives. Bernard details that he was the one who took down the bomb maker; Max stubbornly insists that he was off limits. Max then tells the two that everything will be sorted out after he puts the two of them behind bars. Bernard tries to leave, but Max insists that they should stay so he can bring them in.
The hunter tells them he owns a hotel and that they should go with him. They agree, but Max leaves them. Max doesn't want to become a fugitive as well or have people question his morals. Eddie watches TV and looks up when the door opens. It's Max.
Frustrated with the only channel on TV running shows with only Rick Mercer, Bernard goes to the lobby to see if it is possible to get any other channels. The hunter (Dudley) tells him there is one more and on the TV right behind him. Bernard turns to see "Cool Cops" and himself on the televions. Dudley says the show may give his hotel more exposure. Max and Eddie watch the show aswell, but do not seem to recognize Bernard, and comment on how he looks mentally handicapped.
While unknowingly being filmed, Max and Eddie argue over Bernard's situation. Bernard watches as Max tells Eddie he still doesn't want to throw away his career by associating himself with Bernard. Mason and his gang move in the snow.
Max and Eddie approach Bernard. Bernard says, "We need to talk." He asks the camera man to leave, but the camera explains with no viewers they will no longer get to have a free suite. Bernard tells them to bring him in, and accounts a story which will vindicate Max and Eddie. Max disagrees saying the story makes no sense. The camera man tells them to pause so that he can go down and get a new tape.
From the camera's point of view we see Mason shoot and the camera cut out. As Mason and his men enter Dudley attempts to stop them and gets shot.
Bernard goes to open the door after hearing a knock, assuming it is the camera man. He gets no reply when he asks who it is. Eddie tells him not to open it. An explosion goes off blowing the dorr open and engulfing the room in smoke. The smoke clears and Mason taunts Bernard, "I found you." Max takes a breathe, says "here goes nothing" and fires a rocket at Mason. Eddie tells the others that they can get to the lower flow using the balcony. The three jump down. Mason tells his men to take the stairs. Realizing they have been cutoff by Mason's men they try to take the elevator. Mason arrives and knocks out Bernard, Eddie and Max.
Eddie, Max and Bernard are told by Mason to stay outside the gates until they open, and also telling them not to try to escape. Max whines that he put effort into his job and the government is throwing it over on him, and says "This sucks.", and the three laugh. Meanwhile, Mason gets the doors to open after repetitive request from Drake. Mason escorts the three in, while Bernard comments that he'll "be waiting for you in Hell" to Mason. Eddie, the first to go in is shocked to see the Weird Guy's brother (with a pistol in hand) sitting atop a pile of wired fusion coils throughout the department after killing every police officer in the building (before the four arrived). Weird Guy's brother is still grieving over Weird Guy's death, in which Bernard says he could not help it while Max and Eddie regard Weird Guy's brother as "commando." Brother says that he felt powerless, and that they will feel the same. Bernard pleads with Brother to not blow the department up, although Brother does it anyway, saying "may God have mercy on your soul." The explosions hits all 5 of them before going to black screen. Bernard awakes and finds Max on the ground, asking for Eddie, who sarcastically says "What? How am I? I'm alright, thanks". Bernard goes to look for Eddie before getting shot by Mason. As Mason lectures Bernard, Max crawls for a pistol while Mason beats Bernard. As Max is about to shoot Mason, he is incapacitated with a single bullet from Mason. Mason says to Bernard that "No one can save you now" to Bernard, while a Warthog revs up in the distance and Eddie is seen driving the Warthog, crashing through the second gate and killing Mason. Eddie runs to Bernard before he blacks out. Bernard, most likely a few days later narrates that "Conveniently, all evidence incriminating us has been destroyed. Mason is dead. Roman is dead. Every city law enforcement official is gone. Well, except for us three. And one more, thankfully who didn't feel like coming to work that day. In the office, Eddie remarks that he finished the block puzzle in Resident Evil 4, and Max whines that there are no crimes in the city. Eddie says the they still have a job to do while Howard says that he'll sit on his ass. Max and Eddie walk out to patrol and Bernard, with the last line in the series, says "What a ridiculous fucking plot", ending the story of Hard Justice.
Bernard Brown is an ex-policeman from Regent City and the newest member of E.R.E.C.T. He wears a MJONLIR MK. VI with cream color. In E.R.E.C.T., he is the most intelligent and sensible of the four, who actually thinks before he shoots, unlike Max, and has a brain to speak of, unlike Edward. Bernard is a dedicated policeman who is actually concerned about Esoteria's well-being, and is the only one in the department who does not while away his worktime playing Runescape, watching porn or calling his girlfriend like Howard. He prioritizes things much better than Max or Howard. While Howard ignores the calls for backup on the chase of a homicidal killer, chase of a man driving a tank into a residential area and a homicide case, he sends Eddie and Max after a case where a neighbor has his music turned up too loud. Bernard decides to investigate the homicide with Eddie, and sends Max to the music case. Bernard is also a sort-of "loose cannon", when he defies Roman Drake's orders to close the case of the homicide, and tells Max to run a DNA scan on the body. He generally shows more sympathy for the citizens of Esoteria, sympathizing with the driving instructor on his son's arrest, and also the carjacked person in the second episode (despite calling him gay).
Bernard recently became a supporting character in another of Jon CJG's machinima projects: One Life Remaining.
Max is an operative in E.R.E.C.T. He wears white MJOLNIR Mark VI armor, and is never seen without his rocket launcher and battle rifle (except for episode 1, where he has an assault rifle). It is unknown if Max has more brains than Edward, as whenever he sees trouble, he will whip out his rocket launcher and fire. A trigger-happy fellow who "shoots before he thinks", the direct opposite of Bernard. Only Bernard's quick movement saved the carjacked victim in episode 2 from Max's rocket launcher. Max relishes destruction, as can be inferred from his line in episode 1 "Don't split hairs with me. Why go around something when you can go through it". Max goes 200% into his job to make sure that the offender never commits the same crime, like hurling a grenade into the occupant's house, then pointing his rocket launcher at the occupant's head telling him to turn the music down. Max typically orders Eddie around, taking advantage of his weak-mindedness.
Edward "Eddie" StrykerEdit
Eddie is an operative in E.R.E.C.T. He wears blue MJOLNIR Mark VI armor. Oddly, he wears a CQB body piece in Season 2 Episode 1 during the scene where he attempts to speed run through Resident Evil 4. He normally carries a taser and an assault rifle. He frequently uses the taser to stop escaping criminals or when Max tells him to to "taser everyone". Eddie is a weak-minded person, as he is easily manipulated and controlled by Max into doing anything. He is also a terrible driver, as he crashes into another car nearly instantly after leaving the E.R.E.C.T. office. (However it was not his fault, considering the man was speeding while he was driving at a normal pace) Eddie has a complete lack of a brain or any intelligence. He does not realize that a homicide victim is dead even though it is a limbless and headless "stump". Eddie also has a constant knack for disobeying Bernard, even in life threatening situations. When the two became trapped in a chemical plant filled with chlorine gas, Bernard ordered Eddie to use urine-soaked tissues to shield his mouth and nose from inhaling the gas. Eddie refused, thinking that it was too disgusting, despite Bernard's protests that he would die if he didn't. In Season 2 Episode 4, Eddie was attacked by an unknown figure. In Season 2 Episode 5, Eddie is shown regaining consciousness and found out that he must escort Bernard to maximum security. However he took Bernard and fled to Canada.
While Eddie may not be smart, he is generally polite to most other people.
The Head of E.R.E.C.T. Howard typically spends his day at his computer, playing different video games, watching porn, and watching over 100 Youtube videos at the same time (impossible as it sounds), or trying out burnouts in the car park, pausing only to instruct the E.R.E.C.T team to attend to crimes that he sees fit. Howard is gullible and not very intelligent, proven when he lets Bernard and Eddie leave the office for pizza. Howard is all drama and no intelligence.
Though Roman Drake probably instructed Howard to deal with tiny crimes, Howard himself, even if he wasn't instructed, often regards very serious crimes as petty. However, by the end of Season 1, Howard agreed to be more flexible when it comes to crimes.
The mysterious governor of Esoteria, who seems to be keeping Howard and E.R.E.C.T pinned down with useless cases, Runescape and strange orders to NOT investigate cases like homicides. has strong links with Twisted Coersion, as he comes down and threatens Bernard after Bernard discovers that the homicide victim was a member of Twisted Coersion. In addition, he willingly cooperated with Mason Clark to try and get Bernard captured by giving Clark the green light to send his men after Bernard and Eddie (a normal governor would have dispatched police officers). His shoulders color changed form Season 1 to Season 2, in S1 were brown but in S2 were orange.
It is possible that Roman uses Twisted Coersion as a secret police force like a dictator, which led to numerous cases of crime.
The character is never named, but only referred to as the "Weird Guy" in the credits. First appears in Episode 8, when he causes a disturbance in the Esoteria Shopping Center by asking passer-by to feel his buttocks, which he claims were recently shaved. He invites Max to watch Indian in the cupboard, which Max agrees to. After finishing the movie, the Weird Man detains Max at his home and makes him watch all 18 discs of sex and the city, which will take days. Max finally gets out of his house when he receives Bernard's call to pick him up at the waste processing center, but the Weird Man follows him. In the end there are only three places on the warthog and four people; the Weird Man is thrown out to allow Bernard to get in.
The Weird Man then turns up at the E.R.E.C.T station claiming that Bernard has committed assault against him. Howard almost calls the police when Weird Man says Bernard can escape jail by going out to dinner with him. They go to the Olive Garden. As they try to order their meals, the Weird Man forces Bernard to pick something other than soup since it isn't a real meal. They both order lasagna and decide to talk for a bit. Bernard finally asks him if he is homosexual, but he replies that he just likes to "live life to it's fullest." The two soon get over their hatred for one another and seem to become friends.
Following the explosion that badly injured Max and Eddie, Bernard recruits the Weird Man as a temporary member of E.R.E.C.T. to help track down the cop killer. Much like the other members, he immediately becomes drawn to the computers so he can play games. Soon, they learn where the killer is located and set out to capture him, but as they explore the compound, Bernard gets caught in a trap and falls through a deep hole in the ground. While Bernard is incapacitated, the Weird Man is taken hostage by the killer. Bernard recovers shortly and has a stand off with the killer while the Weird Man is held at gunpoint. The Weird Man wants Bernard to shoot the killer, but when he doesn't, the killer shoots the Weird Man in the back of the head, killing him instantly. The killer is then gunned down by Bernard out of revenge. Three weeks after the incident, Bernard, Eddie and Max all attend a memorial to the Weird Man, his grave being unmarked (probably because nobody knew his real name). When Max is telling Roman Drake about the Weird Man in Season 2 Episode 2, he reveals that he knew the name all along, but as he tells Drake the Weird Man's name, a loud crash is heard, obscuring Max's voice from the Audience.
Mason Clark was first seen in Episode 7 at the Esoteria Gentleman's Club. He does nothing when the suspect is confronted at first, but when he overhears the words "Esoteria police force", he kills the suspect while he's using the toilet, unknown to Bernard. In Episode 8, Mason reports to the leader of Twisted Coercion, informing him that Bernard had "taken the bait" and asking what his next orders were. Mason was also the one who trapped Bernard at the abandoned factory where he then subjected Bernard to chlorine in an attempt to suffocate him. At the Twisted Coercion headquarters, he appears to be Roman Drake's right hand man with certain crimes. In Episode 19, Mason convinced Roman that taking members of Twisted Coercion to stop Bernard and Eddie from escaping the country would be a better idea than using police officers. While still in search for them Mason and one of his men come across two stoners who they forcefully get information from before killing them. Upon his arrival in Canada he kills the camera guy and the canadian and after an epic chase scene captures Max, Bernard, and Eddie. In the series finale, he takes them back to the Esoterian Police Department only to found out that the wierd guys brother has killed everyone (except Howard) ,including Roman and has the entire place rigged with explosives. After he unsucessfully attempts to kill them all ,Mason, who survived shoots Bernard and then Max and as he attempts to excute Bernard, Eddie who also survived rams a car into Mason, effectively killing him.
Weird Guy's BrotherEdit
He is first seen at the end of Episode 2 Season 2, visiting the Weird Guy's grave. He encounters Bernard (who is also visiting the Weird Guy's grave) where he reveals that he is the Weird Guy's Brother. He annoyed Bernard with his neediness for awhile until Bernard, out of guilt, reveals the real circumstances of the Weird Guy's death. However, the man was wearing a microphone and Roman Drake was recording the whole thing. He then makes his last his last appearance in the series finale unfortunetly having killed everbody (except Howard). As revenge on Bernard The weird guy's brother attemps to kill him by shooting a bullet into the rigged explosives but in doing so kills himself.
Minor Characters Edit
Driving instructor Edit
The driving instructor that gives Bernard his test for an Esoteria driving licence. Bernard first meets him in episode 4, when Eddie crashes into the instructor's car, as he hurries to work, and Bernard hurries to his driving test. After a brief altercation with Bernard, he quickly drives off to the driving centre, where he meets Bernard again, and Bernard discovers that he isn't going to have a pleasant time on the test. During the test, he continues his verbal sparring with Bernard, and after it, he gripes that he hates the police force as his son was arrested for downloading three songs and he had to pay his bail. After Bernard responds that he had nothing to do with that, he passes Bernard and gives him the licence, although he still thinks Bernard is a dick.
Homicide victim Edit
The homicide victim was never really seen, just looked down upon by Bernard and Eddie in episode 3. On the date of his death, his rent was due or already overdue. His death was discovered by the landlord, who arrived to collect his rent, but failed to receive a response, then called the police. The homicide victim's state when the police arrived was armless, headless and legless. His cause of death was obviously homicide, as it is impossible to commit suicide that way, and even if, it is unlikely the individual would mutilate himself brutally.
Homicide suspect Edit
The suspect wears white MJOLNIR Mark VI armour. He is seen in episode 7, in the Esoteria Gentleman's Club, where he is taking the services of a prostitute. His DNA was found on the homicide victim's body, and Bernard goes to confront him with Eddie. However, the suspect denies any connection with the murder, and goes to the bathroom. Unfortunately for him, the man at the counter overheard the words "Esoteria police force", and goes into the toilet. He drowns the suspect in the washbasin, without saying anything.
The cop killerEdit
The cop killer as he appeared in 2 of the registration acts, is a homocidal murderer that purposely targets esoteria's police force. He killed 3 cops, 1 with a car bomb, one with a bunch of explosives rigged to blow when a door opened and with his sniper rifle in act 1 of resignation.
The cop killer then sent a message via radio to all members of E.R.E.C.T telling them his location of residence and claiming he was surrendering. Max and eddie pick up the message and go to arrest the cop killer but Bernard, at his dinner with wierd guy, ignores the transmission. When bernard learns of how the cop killer killed the first 3 cops, he realises the trap and attempts to warn eddie just before the rigged bombs on the door go off, leaving max and eddie just barely alive but unconcious.
Bernard then goes with wierd guy to arrest the cop killer, despite Roman telling the police force not to investigate. The cop killer activates explosives which send bernard down into the room below while taking wierd guy as a human shield. Bernard finds the cop killer with wierd guy at gun point, bernard hesitates to act when the cop killer taunts him and wierd guy encourages him to shoot, causing the cop killer to shoot wierd guy in the head. This causes Bernard to go into a rage and shoot the cop killer twice in the head.
- Bar owner: Tell me, Bernard, why do you want to work as a dishwasher at Reggie's Bar & Grill. That obviously can't be just for the money.
- Bernard: No, not at all. In fact I always wanted to wash dishes. Ever since I was a... kid. While the other kids were out having fun playing with the toy soldiers and toy guns their parents bought them, I saved my allowance just to buy some dishes, just so I could wash them over and over... and over.
- Bar owner: I see!
- Bernard: Yes! Far as I'm concerned, washing dishes was the reason I went to college for four years. And the reason I had regular schooling for twelve. It's the reason I was born. It's not... just because I'm willing to do anything to pay my rent and keep myself fed.
- Bar owner: What an inspiration. [pause] However, I'm afraid I can't give you the job.
- Bernard: Wait, what? Why?
- Bar owner: Well, I just don't feel that you're really commited to this job.
- Bernard Brown is in Howard Marshall's office held at double gunpoint.
- Howard: So, you mind telling me who the hell you are?
- Bernard: Bernard Brow...
- Howard: SHUT UP! [walks over to Bernard and puches him in the face]
- Bernard: Ow! What the fuck?!
- Howard: What gives you the right to interfere with the law?
- Bernard: The fact your top dog here was about to blow up the wrong guy.
- Howard: Who are you?"
- Bernard: I was just about to tell you...
- Howard: Blah blah blah blah blah. I don't have time for your circular logic and mumbo jumbo. Just give it to me straight.
- Bernard: [mumbles] I don't believe this... [aloud] My name is Bernard Brown and I'm an ex-cop from Regent City.
- Bernard: You didn't realize he was dead.
- Witness: How would I, I'm not a doctor!
- [Bernard's phone rings]
- Bernard: Hello?
- Eddie: Bernard, it's Eddie. You're not gonna believe this. I just scanned the body under UV and it's covered in semen. It's all over the house, too. Dumbass had a pretty good time before he snuffed himself...
- Bernard: That's blood, dumbass. Blood glows under UV light.
- Eddie: Well, no disrespect, Bernard, but I really think you're wrong.
- Bernard: IT'S BLOOD, DIPSHIT! Over and out. [hangs up]
- Eddie: Blood? That means... [sighs] Yup. He's dead.
- Civilian: Hey! Are you the police?
- Max: I'm E.R.E.C.T.
- Civilian: What? Ugh... Uhh... Cool. I guess. [pause] Yes, sometimes you can't help it...
- Max: What?
- Civilian: Mhm.
- Max: ...the fuck, I got a report of disturbance here, what's the problem?
- Civilian: Oh, so you are the police.
- Max: What?
- [Weird Man runs into the E.R.E.C.T. office]
- Bernard: What...what are you doing here?
- Weird Man: Ha! I was hoping I'd find you here! Sir, this man assaulted me!
- Bernard: What?!
- Howard: Is this true?
- Bernard: No...
- Weird Man: He grabbed me and pulled me out of the side seat of a car!
- Bernard: Yeah, my fucking seat of a police unit! Get the fuck out of here, you douche!
- Weird Man: I'll do no such thing!
- Howard: Alright, alright, hold on a second, stay right there Bernard, don't move.
- Bernard: What are you doing?
- Howard: I'm just calling the police, they're coming here to arrest you.
- Bernard: What?!
- Weird Man: Nonono, hold on sergeant, hold on. I'm willing to drop the charges, if, [asks Bernard for his name], yes if Officer Brown here, agrees, to go out to dinner with me.
- Bernard: What the hell?
- Howard: Sounds fair to me!
- Weird Man: So, what's it gonna be, Officer Brown, a night in the cell, or a night... at the Olive Garden?
- Bernard Brown walks into The Olive Garden restaurant,
- Weird Man: You're late!
- Bernard: Suck my balls, weirdo.
- Weird Man: Okay.
- Bernard: What?!
- Bernard Brown, Howard Marshall and the Weird Man are at the Esoteria General Hospital to check on Eddie and Max's situation at the hospital.
- Doctor: Officer Brown?
- Bernard Brown: Yes?
- Doctor: Congratulations. You're a father.
- Bernard Brown: What?!
- Weird Man: Hey, that's great, man!
- Bernard, Eddie and Max are assigned to save a cat stuck on a tree.
- Bernard: God, I fucking hate this job. I'm resigning for real.
- Edward: Here, puss puss puss!
- Max: Get down here you little asshole!
- Bernard: So you're my prison escort, huh?
- Eddie: I hate this as much as you do, Bernard.
- Bernard: I think that's arguable.
Hard Justice has been well-received by the fan community. The series is praised for the inventive mixture of comedy and seriousness in addition to a well-constructed storyline. While it is not the most popular of his series, it is possibly one of his fastest-growing.
Episode 7 does not appear to be as well-received, due to the opening dream sequence. This is because it wasted time of the episode and portrayed Master Chief in a derogatory manner.