Spriggs
From Halo Machinima
Spriggs is a Halo 3 machinima comic science fiction comedy series created by Running Gun Productions and has been distributed from the internet. The series is about a group known as the fifth intergalactic infantry who are abandoned by the proclaimed army and are left on Zambai 7. The history of the machinima's setting is: With the galaxy now at peace after the Intergalactic Civil War, the humans have signed a peace treaty with the Covenant Elites. The series opens up after 3 war veterans are removed from their original posts and are to form the fifth intergalactic infantry however, what they do not know is that it is just a plot to keep those chosen few away from the army from causing anymore damage than what they had already caused.
Contents |
[edit] Plot
[edit] Season 1
[edit] Episode 1: "Spriggs"
Willy is once again trying to kill Spriggs. Hammer then assigns Triple M to put a stop to this after promoting him to Sergeant (all due to Triple M's ability to get himself into trouble without people trying). Triple M at first manages to calm Willy down before Spriggs makes him lose it again and makes him fire multiple rockets at random directions just to try to hit Spriggs, only to accidentally fire a rocket into Hammer's command room while he was trying to call in for more soldiers, setting off explosions inside and making him fly into a wall. Triple M comments that at least he didn't hit anything important, right before a rocket that Willy shot creates a big explosion off-screen.
Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xAg83sOZBxM
[edit] Episode 2: "Housecall"
Willy and Triple M bring Hammer to a room that a nurse will arrive to heal Hammer's wounds. They drop him twice along the way and Willy is afraid to watch him alone despite Hammer being crippled. Hammer then threatens to slit Willy's throat and rip his testicles out. Willy tells Hammer of a nurse coming. Hammer first complains about the unbearable pain, but then suddenly asks which nurse was called. Willy replied that it was the one "in your little black book, you ladies man." Hammer requested for a pistol to blow his brains out, but the nurse arrives earlier, Hammer identifying her as Meme. Meme asks Willy to leave but Hammer insists to stay. But, after an argument between Hammer and Meme, Willy eventually runs off while Hammer begs Willy to stay, offering to give him a promotion, give him money, buy him hookers, a car, a boat, and a book full of hookers (The S.S. Hooker). Meme says it's just her and him, much to Hammer's dismay. Outside, Willy comments that he is going to blog about this. Spriggs arrives and Willy thanks him for a number of things in the past (namely not asking him to take off his pants in front of his former girlfriend), promising a quick and painless death. However, Spriggs repays him by smashing his Mongoose at Willy.
Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ALditcq9WQ
[edit] Episode 3: "My Tank is Fight"
Spriggs heads out the same building and Willy runs after him, saying "Of course you know, this means WAR." While Meme is healing Hammer, he accuses her of harvesting him for organs. She claims that he is not worth it whatsoever as his meat is and always was for "unfit for consumption". Meme said that there wasn't enough anesthetic to put a two-year-old kid under due to lack of supplies, once again due to lack of Pelicans due to the UNSC confiscating them to "Handle the growing crisis on Earth." Hammer said that command told them that the medics had the Pelicans, which Meme replies that they were using Hornets to transport people. Willy meanwhile prepares to face off against Spriggs again while Triple M checks up on him. Willy attempts to target Spriggs but can't get him to stay still. Suddenly Spriggs then appears three times at once, confusing Willy enough to allow Spriggs to get into a tank to chase and shoot a panicking Willy, also destroying his weapons. During the credits there are three aliens (Covenant Elites) talking about a spaceship crash.
Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=djiPUsCEqZA
[edit] Episode 4: "Cake or Death"
Willy asks Triple M to open the front gate of the complex but has to go through an extremely complicated computer system that may set off either flame turrets, deadly neurotoxins, or floor spikes, and was told not to go for the cake because that was how they lost their major. During his lecture on how to operate, Meme contacts Triple M for supplies, Hammer begs Triple M to get him out of Meme's care claiming that she hit him again. Triple M then gets a call from General Volin who needed to speak to Captain Meme and asks Triple M not to kidnap any more friendly generals. When General V finishes her message Triple M mutters "bitch", which Meme hears and is then told by Triple M that Volin wants to speak to her. Willy then interrupts the line by hacking into it and asking to open the door, and if they need any Morphine, which Hammer demands. Triple M manages to open the door at last. The aliens meanwhile are arguing about what to do, the White alien (Soltri) wants food while the Grey one (Rotri) suggests killing and eating the humans while the Blue one (Boltri, or Boom Boom) comments about how they taste. They steal a Warthog and drive off with it. Triple M then is checking inventory to make some sort of Mech. Willy manages to steal Spriggs's Mongoose only for Spriggs to nod disapprovingly and to use his spare. Willy then carelessly drives it over a hill. Spriggs drives by Triple M who wishes for a Mongoose, only to have one drop out of the sky. He then tries a more whimsical wish only to get Willy to land on the ground,causing him to exclaim "Aw, you suck!" Willy then pursues Spriggs with a flamethrower, attempts to trap Spriggs and after doing so attempts to kill him with a tank, only when he attempts to fire the tank it explodes. In a rage, Willy pulls out his Rocket Launcher and begins firing rockets in random locations. One coincidentially enough is aimed at the supplies Triple M had arranged for the construction of his mech. The rocket detonates the Fusion Cores (which were also coincidentally enough the power supply for the base), which ruins the rest of his supplies for the Mech.
Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M85NmgH6S4A
[edit] Episode 5: "Hammer Time"
Meme announces that she has finished Hammer's treatment in the explosion caused by Willy in Episode 1 to Triple M and Willy. Hammer asks how he looks and the three sugarcoat it due to the fact that Meme has made him look like an Elite. When Triple M asks Spriggs how Hammer looks, Spriggs responds by a series of swear words (which are bleeped because of a running gag that Spriggs speaks in a series of beeps). They restate their comments about Hammer's appearance such as Meme quotes "I did my job to the human race to ensure that you would never breed again," Hammer says that he is going for a drive and gets in his suit, commenting that it is harder to fit in than usual. The aliens meanwhile have come back and Roltri comments that the mission was successful but Soltri comments that he is not reliable while Boltri is trying to get their attention while Roltri recollects that he got the alien three translator in which Soltri comments on why the grunts were so willing to trade three of theirs for the aliens' one translator. Boltri then finally gets their attention, asking if they remembered to get any food, which they didn't, much to Soltri's dismay. While back at the base, Hammer angrily asks where the tanks have gone, in which Triple M blames Willy and says that they could potentially be halfway to Kansas. Hammer asks why would they be halfway to Kansas in which Triple M comments that the power cores that he was working with may have been unstable. When Hammer asks what power cores, Triple M replies that he had no recollection of any power cores. Willy comments that maybe Triple M may have been working on a Plasma Core launching system because our enemy doesn't have one (to which Hammer angrily replies that there are no enemies due to the fact that they were at peacetime). Hammer asks Willy for a report on the plausibilty of a Plasma Core launching system and have it at his desk at 0430 because "I need napkins for my donuts." then asks Triple M to begin rebuilding his tanks instead of toliet detail, which Hammer gives to Meme. Hammer says that this is his base and she should be working under him if she's gonna be watching him. The next scene shows Hammer cleaning up the toilets. Hammer says to Triple M "Well that went well," in which Triple M replies that "You really showed her," before Meme orders them to get back to work.
Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gDOzpPc-kKw
[edit] Episode 6: "Unloaded""
Willy calls off his truce with Spriggs as he chases him throughout the valley in a Scorpion tank. Willy follows Spriggs hoping the tank is loaded but ends up getting yelled at by Triple M who hasn't actually finished fixing the tank therefore not loading it with any rounds (or Nerf rounds), so Willy decides just to ram Spriggs. As Willy chases Spriggs, Willy, Spriggs and Triple M end up having a Warthog, stolen by the group of lost aliens, slammed into them because of the driver, driving with no hands through the air. This seems to mix match who is where, ending with Soltri in the driver's seat of the Warthog with Triple M in the passenger with a Magnum to his head. Boltri is on the back of the Scorpion, whacking it with his fist, and Rotri is meleeing the cover of the Scorpion tank with his Gravity Hammer. Spriggs seems to stay in front with his Mongoose still going, continuing the chase but with some extras as Boltri and Rotri are discussing how it wouldn't matter if Willy didn't let them in if the Scorpion tank "Went boom." Meme and Hammer appear now standing at the gate talking about Willy as Spriggs drives through, with the tank running Hammer and Meme over behind him. Hammer ends up now on the back of Spriggs's Mongoose telling him to stop, soon to be nailed by the tank and yelling to keep going instead. Hammer then turns his attention to Willy and yells at him to stop the tank. At the back, Meme ends up in the gunner of the Warthog with Sotri doing donuts. Meme asks Triple M, who's still in the passenger, what the alien is doing and he answers: "Third Gear", slightly making Meme studder as she thinks to give the alien permission. Sotri comments on there being another one, which Triple M replies if he ever shuts up. Sotri replies that he would if there wasn't a pistol stuck to his head, to which Triple M switches to his shotgun. Sotri comments, "Oh, that feels so much better." as he resumes the chase. The scene goes to Hammer and Spriggs rounding a corner with Willy driving his tank with the two aliens still on him, very close to the mongoose. Willy then begins to speak of a breaking system... But is to late as he drives the tank off the side of a cliff with the Warthog driving into the tank, also driving off the cliff. From left to right on a ridge Willy, Hammer, Triple M, and Meme all look down the cliff at the wreckage below as Willy compares the size of the gorge with Hammer's mom, Hammer saying bye to his tank, Triple M stating the Hog is gone as well and Meme saying the aliens are down in the gorge also having Hammer follow up by calling the Warthog junk. When the group turns to return to base the only vehicle left is Spriggs's mongoose. Triple M tries to coax Spriggs's to allow him on the back to give him a ride to base, but he just turns and drives off. As the group heads back to base, Meme stops them so she can talk to Willy about where he gets his supplies. Willy replies with a "I get it delivered" with Meme stating she found wrappers from fast food restaurants on his floor, eventually pissing off Triple M who starts to beat the crap out of Willy with Hammer stopping him just so he can kill Willy, but Meme screams that she can be the only one who will kill, following up with no Pelican drops in two weeks. Willy and Meme continue on, calling each other idiots, trying to outrank the other, and flaming each other on their ranks, and soon ending with Meme and Willy explaining how if the were command, they'd put a bunch of idiots on a rock somewhere, allowing Triple M to explain that Zambai 7 is that type of rock for abandoning a bunch of idiots on. The camera then zooms to show a hidden Spartan in the distance, called back by Volin after learning that the Fifth Intergalactic Infantry Battalion had actually learned why they were stationed on Zambai 7 in the first place. The Spartan calmly replies that they take their time, stating that it would take a miracle for him to be found. Ironically, Rotri stumbles across him soon afterward.
Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2PCpzB0awd4
[edit] Season 2
[edit] Episode 7: "The Heart of Dorkness"
The episode begins with the same blue Spartan found in Episode 6, unconscious, and remember what occurred two days ago. The scene switches to the UNSC base, where Volin is speaking to the blue Spartan, identified as Lieutenant Rogir, explaining that with Meme embedded in the Fifth, their insidious plot to keep the idiots stranded on Zambai 7 was close to being unraveled, which could turn out as a worse case scenario since both Spriggs and Willy were assigned to the Fifth, as well as Triple M, which was apparently sent there due to a mishap between him, an Elite general, and a tutu. Rogir commented that he did enjoy Triple M's stunt, as the Elite did look really good in the tutu. Volin tells him that they require a special operative. A man of action and vision. Rogir replied with "Yes ma'am." until he learned that Volin was referring to him, which the cowardly lieutenant replied with ''Oh hell, no!". Volin asked him if he had a choice, with Rogir replying that he could just shoot himself now and save himself the trouble. Volin denied that request and ordered that he be on the Hornet at 0610, which Rogir replied that it was currently 0609. Volin reminded Rogir that failure to comply would be viewed as dereliction of duty, where he would be shot.... to the officer's choosing. Rogir left immediately, with Volin commenting "And they say good help is hard to find." The scene then switches to the valley, where Rogir sees Willy testing out his newly made Plasma Core Launching System (referenced in Episode 5) on Spriggs, although apparently missing the red Spartan zooming around on his Mongoose. While Rogir was continuing his monologue on how command was a bit crazy, but Spriggs and Willy far outclassed that, he obliviously never noticed the burning Hornet crashing behind him, a victim of Willy's rage. Rogir commented that Willy had never been right after the war, due to one of Spriggs's operations. The camera switches to Willy, where he is seen flinging power cores at Spriggs to no lasting damage (scratch the Hornet). As Spriggs used Willy's Plasma Core Launching System to launch himself and his Mongoose, Rogir commented, "Spriggs, the black hole of all classified reports. The kind of classified report that came to you dipped in ink, to save time." Rogir then kept watch behind a rock, commenting that Willy's attempts to kill Spriggs were better than television. Willy yelled that he ran out of Plasma Cores to launch at him and it would take all day to haul it back up the hill to kill him with it. Willy and Spriggs decided on a truce (Spriggs replying in beeps from his Mongoose) that Willy would haul up the Plasma Cores back up to his launching system so he could pick up with his attempts to kill Spriggs tomorrow, approximately the same time. Spriggs drives off, and Willy looks for his power cores, which seemingly vanish. The only cause for it (in Willy's mind) is Triple M, and he storms off to look for him. The scene switches to Triple M, beside a Scorpion tank, speaking to Meme on the Com. Meme needed to speak with Willy, but he unfortunately turned off his Com, and Meme asked Triple M if he could find Willy and tell him to turn on his Com. Triple M said that he would get right on it as soon as possible. Hearing Willy behind him, Triple M told Willy to turn on his Com and turned toward him, only to see Willy holding up a minigun toward Triple M. Willy asked Triple M where the power cores were, which Triple M replied that he didn't take any power cores. Willy asked Triple M if Mr. Minigun wouldn't get angry at him if he was lying, to which Triple M replied "That depends. Is Mr. Tank going to get angry because you're threatening me?" and, corresponding to that, the tank's main cannon became locked on Willy. Triple M asked if he would take Willy's power cores without asking. Willy replied why he would answer that question after the time Triple M made all the power cores mysteriously disappear in his attempt to create a railgun (which was actually his ruined attempt to make a mech). Willy said that, if he didn't have them, Hammer obviously didn't want them after Episode 1's incident, and Meme was too busy yapping on the radio, who would that leave? The scene switches to Spriggs and Rogir passing each other without really noticing each other, then back to Willy and Triple M, agreeing that they would split all found or mislocated power cores found as well as any sandwiches found along the way. Willy then says that he would go back to killing Spriggs the old fashioned way, to which Spriggs (who turned up behind Willy) replied with a beep, startling Willy. As Spriggs hurried off, Willy called off their truce and drove off in Triple M's tank, forwarding Episode 6's events. After a few brief scenes from Episode 6, the scene switches back to Rogir, held captive by the aliens. Soltri comments that Rotri and his translators were made of fail, then says to bring out the extended translators, vowing to find out what he's saying even if they have to kill him in the process. Switching back to the Fifth after the events of Episode 6, the battalion complains about how far away their base was with Hammer asking if they would talk about something else, to which Willy replies that he would bitch a bit about how they were all left to die by command. Triple M yells for silence among the group, and Meme agrees with him, asking Willy to imitate Spriggs for a bit. Spriggs, driving a Warthog, pulls up to Willy. Willy tells him that he's too tired to kill him right now and to either shove the Warthog up his ass or keep on driving. Spriggs takes the latter of the two choices, much to Hammer's and Meme's dismay as they chase after the speeding Warthog. Triple M comments on how Willy just always tries to be a bastard. The scene switches to Rogir's monologue about how the Fifth was supposed to hit the Elites hard at a base in Zambai 7, only to find the base abandoned and the Human-Covenant War starting. By the time the Fifth was organized and deployed, the war was over and the Fifth remained the largest military force left surviving. Switching back to Rogir and the aliens, Rogir begs for his life from the aliens, who, by their reactions, have absolutely no idea what he's saying at all. Soltri yells "Stop screaming and we'll kill you." to which Rogir screams that alive is good, yielding a bit of a positive reaction from the Elites. Due to their crappy translators, Soltri and his brothers have an impossibly hard time asking Rogir to take them to his leader. Rogir replies "All your base are belong to us.", which the translator translates as You've been Pwned with a big P. Rotri gives Boltri permission to shoot Rogir, which he attempts with the Spartan Laser but misses, yielding a long rant of yells and screams from Rogir. Rogir asks them what the hell is wrong with them because what they were doing to him was in directly violation of the Human-Elite Peace Agreement and, because they could barely understand him, he couldn't answer his questions. The translator, unfortunately, translated it as ""Blah blah blah, you're race can't speak. Go to hell. I won't answer your questions." Soltri gives Boltri permission to do whatever he wants to him, which Boltri does gladly. Rogir mutters that the Elites were morons, which Boltri replies that Mom and Dad were second cousins, which Rogir corrects as brother and sister. Boltri promises to make Rogir's death slow and painful. Rogir attempts to bribe them with a candy bar, but Boltri whines that he won't get any fun. Rogir asks who the hell were they, to which Boltri quickly replies that the pink one was Soltri, the gray one was Rotri, and he was Boltri, or Boom Boom as his brothers called them, but Rogir was to call him Your lord and master. Rogir asks if he could be let go, but Boltri says that he was their first real prisoner of war (since their previous one was already dead). Rogir says that it would be impossible for him to be a prisoner of war since they were at peace, to which Soltri confirms that the translator is broken since he swore he heard Rogir say that they were at peace. Rogir says that they worked things out with the Arbiter, which Soltri exclaims "There's a new Arbiter?" Rogir calmly explains that the Elites joined the humans after the Prophets betrayed them, to which Rotri scoffs "Right. Next you'll tell us that the Arbiter and the Demon joined forces hand in hand to save the universe." which was ironically correct. Rogir asks if the aliens had been living under a rock, to which Soltri replies "Maybe." Rogir comments that this was almost as bad as that Elite general that Triple M put in a tutu. When the aliens ask which general this was, Rogir says that it was an Elite called Trogtree (sp?), which the three simultaneously exclaimed "Dad!" Soltri remembers that Triple M was mentioned among the humans, and asked if it was the red one, while Rotri says that he heard it was the green one. Boltri exclaims that he has a plan, saying that all he'll need to get Triple M was spray paint and a very petite human, which happened to be Rogir. Back at the human base, Meme and Hammer are exhausted from their long walk back from the valley, while Willy explained that it was their own fault and they should have let him handle it. Hammer angrily retorts that, even if he had hit Spriggs, his rockets would have destroyed the Warthog. Willy said that it might have, five miles from where they were now so it would have saved them a lot of walking. Meme comments bitterly that you can't argue with stupid. Hammer tries to bring the group together so they can devise a plan to leave Zambai 7, but before they do, they get a challenge from the aliens, hilariously misinterpreting a video game by saying that "If you refuse, we will feed your Princess Peach (Rogir spray painted pink) to your legendary villain: Mario!" Willy misunderstands the challenge, believing it's Cinemax, while Triple M believes that they got Action Network and that Willy fucked up again. As the aliens finish their challenge, Willy says, "This show sucks. Which channel is Mythbusters on?" and switches to a different channel, ending the episode.
Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bBh5JJBJpyg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rnn5pDPoGF4
[edit] Episode 8: "Special Delivery"
Willy begins preaching about how command left them to rot and die slowly on Zambai 7, and proposes that they fight back against the oppression being dealt by command. Meme dismisses him in mid-rant, allowing her, Triple M, Hammer, and Spriggs to resume their card game. Triple M first asks Hammer, then Spriggs if he has any twos, which causes Willy to pull out a Rocket Launcher to kill Spriggs. Hammer tries to dissuade Willy by saying that they were all in a room filled with high explosives and that he was going to kill them all again. Triple M first tells him that they were all in the room, including the doctor who would be very angry with him if she lives and, when that didn't work, asked Willy if he would rather attack command for stranding them on Zambai 7 or attack Spriggs. Coupled with Willy's low intelligence, this complicated thought causes Willy to have a stroke, which Meme takes care of. When Willy is revived, Willy apparently has amnesia about what happened, in which Hammer repeated Triple M's question, causing Willy to have another stroke. Meme revives him, in which Willy says that that would put a dent in his manscaping. Meme tells him to avoid the subject, but Hammer presses on it, provoking Meme to tell Willy, "What happens to him, I do to you, except worse." Willy asks if she's really going to follow up on that, in which Meme shocks him. Meme then tells Spriggs to leave for a bit, saying that Willy was going to be difficult today. As Spriggs leaves the base, he notices a group of UNSC Hornets landing only a few miles away. Donning a Sniper Rifle, he speeds off in a Mongoose after them. After Meme calms Willy down, Hammer returns to devising a plan to escape Zambai 7, and asks Willy if he could meet the contact that kept delivering his freight to him from across the galaxy. Willy at first tries to call out some unknown person from the shadows, then exclaims that he was hanging out with Spriggs (who Willy says is a bad influence on him) then comments that, even if he was here, he wouldn't be able to fly them out anyway. Hammer asks if he has any other plans, which Willy answers that there could be something in the old base, then exclaims that they had a prisoner to interrogate there. Hammer says that he'd rather stay in the base since he had been blown up either, so Meme and Triple M (tricked by Meme into accompanying her) follow Willy to the base. Meanwhile, Vollin, leading the First Semi-mechanized Infantry Battalion, lands the Hornets in the valley and explains that, since Rogir was most likely captured, interrogated, and executed, that the Fifth became too much of a lingering threat and had to be disposed of. Spriggs follows behind them, establishing a sniping position. Vollin explains to her troops that it is essential that they maintain the element of surprise, but ironically they stumbled across where the battle between the Fifth's two greatest heroes and the aliens was supposed to take place, and Soltri, Boltri, and Rotri open fire. Rogir recognizes Vollin and pleads with her to save him, which Vollin mutters, "Why does this always happen to me?" As the two fight, the aliens prove their incompetence and fail to hit any of the Spartans, but Spriggs, hidden away, begins picking off Vollin's forces. Vollin orders her soldiers to attack Spriggs since the aliens couldn't hit the broad side of a barn at this distance, but ironically the soldier closest to Vollin gets sniped by Soltri, giving the aliens their first (and only) kill. The battle lasts for a few more seconds before all of Vollin's forces are eliminated. Seeing that Vollin's forces are destroyed, Spriggs throws a grenade at the aliens. Rotri and Boltri stop firing and look at the grenade, Boltri accurately recognizing it. As the three are occupied, Rogir quickly slips away. Rotri corrects Boltri's statement, saying that it was missing the arming pin and therefore it was a live grenade. When Boltri asks what that means, Rotri says that it's going to go boom, and it immediately does, blowing up the three aliens. Vollin comments that now it was just Spriggs and her, but Spriggs immediately shoots her and bashes her with his sniper rifle, knocking the general to the ground. Spriggs overhears from one of the dead Spartan's radios that Squad 2 was in position and Squad 3 was nearing toward the command center. Hearing this, Spriggs immediately takes off, leaving Rogir to approach in horror at the remains of the First Semi-Mechanized Infantry Battalion. Vollin tells him to shut up and help her up. The episode cuts to the base, where Spriggs, arriving, begins taking out parts of Squad 2. In the midst of the battle, Triple M, Meme, and Willy arrive, deep in a conversation of Willy not being able to understand why Meme preferred Spriggs to himself. While the two were conversing, Triple M swore that he heard the sounds of combat and asks if they could check it out, but Willy dismisses it. The three oblivious approach the base, approached numerous times by Spartans from Squad 2 but never actually discovering them as Spriggs silently takes out each one before they can fire upon the three. As the three enter the base, Spriggs approaches the final two Spartans and takes them out with a grenade, causing a drop of blood to fall right in front of Triple M, who, for some reason, doesn't notice it. Meme tells him to relax, saying that no one was out to kill them and Willy comments that Spriggs wasn't anywhere near here, supporting Meme's claim.
Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DxKBROU1YjI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KE0ic99gxak
[edit] Episode 9: "Major Pain"
(Incomplete)
Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5kKTyQ3i8-8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y3qJ8M-cG88
[edit] Episode 10: "Intercepted"
(Incomplete)
Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CwrRSNEitOQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1RY8WroFVg4
[edit] Episode 11: "Bullet Points"
(Incomplete)
Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lNh54MLCexw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JqQLPOxqkU4
[edit] Episode 12: "Blitzkrieg Ball"
(Incomplete)
Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6972Ucigivc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0z466ed4zcg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DEtsD3nJKJA
[edit] Characters
[edit] Main Characters
[edit] Specialist Spriggs
"Beep beep!" - Spriggs's signature line
The main protagonist of the series and is one of the fifth intergalactic infantry. Specialist Spriggs was once a scout for the army and champion of the Marines Moped team, little information is known about Spriggs's whereabouts and has never actually spoken to his teammates. He is also very known for his occasional runaways on his mongoose from Specialist Willy, noted to not be within 2.4 miles of Specialist Willy. He is 23 years of age and he weighs 134 pounds out of armor.
Official Spriggs Information
Former Posting: Scout, Champion of Marines Moped Team, Top Ranked Sniper
Spriggs remains the mystery in the Fifth Intergalactic Infantry Battalion. No one can find any details about his past. All requests seem to dead end at ONI central office, or the barrel of a Gun.
In fact, the only history Spriggs has seems to be with Willy, whose hatred runs deep for Spriggs. However, despite the antagonism, Spriggs has on occasion saved and or helped Willy. Why is the question on everyone's mind.
[edit] Lieutenant Hammer
"Willy! I'm gonna kick your ass as soon as I can feel my goddamn legs!" - Hammer, yelling at a fleeing Willy
One of the other main characters in the series. Lt. Hammer was once a Captain (announced that he should have never became one) of the Army. He is well known for his laziness and was charged twice with fraternizing with his subordinates. He never seems to get anything done which led to his joining of the fifth intergalactic infantry. He is oldest of the crew on Zambai 7 and weighs 191 pounds out of armor.
Official Spriggs Information
Hammer came to Zambai 7 from Zambai Central Command to replace that late Major Kake, Commander Fritz, and the rest of the commissioned officers of the new reduced First Battalion.
If ever there was a man who picked the wrong line of work it was Hammer. He never should have been an officer, and whoever let him graduate from the academy should be shot. He barely pays attention to his men, twice he's been charged with fraternizing with his subordinates, and he never seems to have any luck with getting anything done.
In fact, if his combat record wasn't so good, they'd have gotten rid of him a long time a go. Multiple enemy kills, including an elite in hand to hand combat, the stuff of marine legends. If only he was as good at anything else...
[edit] Specialist Willy
"Get out of the tank! That thing's still under release and I don't want to blow it, cause I have that power. Augh, crap." - Willy, being attacked by Spriggs in a tank
One of the most notable characters in Spriggs, he is known for his uncontrollable anger and "losing it". Willy is a expert on Demolition and Entrenched Defenses and is always trying to kill Spriggs on a everyday basis. When he was part of the Army, he was awarded the purple heart and a silver star for his work in destroying a Covenant Carrier, and after the effects, he was sent to a awards ceremony when he suddenly "lost it" and knocked out a General after being triggered by Spriggs and ended up joining the squad. Willy is 27 years old and ways 210 pounds out of armor.
Official Spriggs Information
Former Posting: Combat Engineer
Technical Specialties: Demolitions and Entrenched Defenses
Specialist Willy is considered a 'prime risk' by ONI, given his technical expertise mixed with uncontrolled aggression. His temper is prone to flare ups (noted by the unit as him 'loosing it' or having 'lost it') which result in damage to everything within a couple kilometers and normally injuries to himself.
To be fair, Willy also has several accommodations besides the purple heart from the war with the Covenent, including a Silver Star for his roll in destroying a Covenant Carrier with equipment provided by a unit of turn-coat grunts following the initial invasion. During the award ceremony however he 'lost it', knocking out a general before a Spartan on hand for the event restrained him. Apparently this was trigger by Spriggs, who was onhand for the celebration.
He's a genius with electronics and explosives but a failure at life in general. The military would courtmartial him, if only they were given the fire support to do so...
[edit] Sergeant Triple M
"You're the lieutenant! I'm not even a sergeant!"
"That's a good point. Let's rectify that, shall we?"
"Aw, crap." - Triple M, being tricked into his sergeant promotion by Hammer
Triple M is the youngest and latest addition to the fifth intergalactic infantry (although Spriggs is technically the youngest in the squad). Triple M's history is known as one of the biggest mistakes in army history, once part of the "Rainbow Squad", according to the Army, no one ever told the Rainbow Squad that the Elites where now at peace with the humans but, Triple M had captured the Elite's general, and took him to Zambai 7. And had some "fun" with him before he was returned home and the general noted that he was not pleased with the tu-tu. Since they were not informed of the hostilities, Rainbow Squad was relived of all charges and Triple M was place within the fifth. Triple M is 24 years of age and he weighs 170 pounds out of armor. His real name is Mitch Miles Murphy...
Official Spriggs Information
Age: 24
Weight Out of Armor: 170lbs
Former Posting: Rifleman
Specialties: Ambidextrous Combat, Pistols, Mechanical Engineering with training in covenant engineering
Triple M is the latest member of the fifth, transferred in from 'the rainbow squad' where he was supposedly responsible for a political mess with the elites than can only be described as 'weird' and 'interesting'. Apparently, no one told them we were at peace, so they waltz over, kidnapped the Elite's general on Zambai 7 and had some fun with him even after they were told to return him. The general was not pleased with the Tu-tu.
Since they had not received word of the end of hostilities, they were technically cleared of all charges. He was, however, put in the fifth for safe keeping.
Since then, he's rode through his time in the fifth as per the continuing disaster it is, barely dodging death and dismemberment. Sometimes at the hands of the rest of the crew, other times at the hands of some of hairbrained mechanical mess.
[edit] Captain Meme
"Your meat is and always was 4F, unfit for consumption." - Meme, speaking to Hammer
The Captain of the medical corp. and is not exactly a good medical officer. Hammer and Meme know each other but don't like each other much, yet are often seen talking to each other when it comes to matters.
Official Spriggs Information
Age: 23
Weight Out of Armor: 160lbs
Former Posting: Head of Mash Unit 7704th, Stationed at Zambai base one
Specialties: Combat Medicine, Logistical Organization, Covenant Anatomy
Captain Meme was the acting head of the 7704th during the planned invasion, with a spotless war record and only slightly marred service record dating back to the 'incident' with Hammer. Known for her no-nonsense demeanor, she never breaks stride except in relation to Hammer. Hammer on the other hand brings on signs of dementia in her, starting with stress and ending with bad surgery and disfigurement.
Her skills in combat are considered so-so, with absolutely no training in heavy artillery, but her medical skills and observational ability have made her a valued resource everywhere else.
[edit] General Vollin
"We lost contact with Rogir, which means in all likely hood he was captured, tortured in unspeakable ways, then disposed of..." - Vollin, speaking to the First Semi-Mechanized Infantry Battalion
Nicknamed General V, she is the General in charge of monitoring and controlling the battalion overall.
Official Spriggs Information
Rank: General
Weight Out of Armor: 162 lbs
Former Posting: Classified
Specialties: Large Scale Combat Maneuvers
General Vollin graduated top of her class from West Point, only to then lead one of the largest disasters in Earth's military history immediately following her relatively easy rise to the top. The court of inquiry found that she suffered from being overly aggressive, often charging in rather than setting up a defensive line, and once past the paper exams she considered logistics academic.
Therefore, when Project Zambai was proposed, she was deemed a natural choice for the leadership of the assault.
[edit] Lieutenant Rogir
"For my monologues, they sent me away. For my sins, they sent me to Zambai Seven." Rogir, in yet another monologue
Rogir is assigned by Vollin to keep an eye on the battalion, only to get captured by the three aliens. He comments on the Elite general Triple M put in a tu-tu turning out to be the dad of the aliens.
Official Spriggs Information
Former Posting: Head MP of Zambai, Pre invasion, Assigned to Office of Naval Intelligence security detail
Specialties: Ability to chew gun and walk at the same time. Observational Skills, Stealth training, ability to stake out
Rogir history in the military has been... checkered. Not bad at any task perse, he just fell victim to a little bit of bad luck and a little bit of timing. There is just something that happened. He told central command about Reach, and Halo, and the Flood.
Of course, his monologue has been more than epic enough to shade his reputation. When the bad news takes fifteen minutes, it doesn't help. When the good news takes so long no one cares, it's even worse. Still, he had useful talents, and more than once his talent for gab has turned a criminal straight.
Therefore, it was deemed a small sacrifice to add a semi-competent officer to the staff of Volin. It was the perfect match, the man who couldn't stop talking with the woman who just wouldn't listen.
[edit] Soltri
"Jeez, do you ever stop bitching?"
"Only when I don't have a pistol pointed at my head."
*shotgun is drawn*
"Oh, that's so much more comforting." - Soltri, being commanded by Triple M
Official Spriggs Information
Specialties: Common Sense
Soltri is the oldest of the three brothers, and was the one complaining the loudest and longest about Rotri's idea to 'borrow' their dad's cruisers. He was also the first to say 'I told you so!' after the crash.
Since then Soltri's job has been to collect and manage the meager resources they have, and to attempt to contact home base. So far, both missions have been a failure due to his brother's bungling nature, but none the less he perseveres.
Currently, he's learning how to boil grass and becoming quite adept at the art of human cuisine, particularly at the preparation of Barbecue and Roast Grey Suit.
[edit] Rotri
"I've got spikes sticking out of my chest!" Rotri, trying to remind Soltri and Boltri of his condition
Official Spriggs Information
Specialties: Sleeping, Acting, Smashing things, and Vehicle Combat
Rotri is a Middle Child, and has for the most part left an uneventful life. Never one to cause trouble, he managed decently during training and enjoyed the act of killing and maiming other species, a sign that he was to go far. However, Rotri lacked one important element that put this in doubt: A survival instinct. Therefore his father ordered that he was never to be given a cruiser of his own, till he stabilized a bit.
Never one to be detoured, Rotri took this as a challenge, and with the aid of his brothers stole the 'Hand of Fate' to go fight the humans man to man.
Nine months after the crash on Zambai, he still remains confident in the righteousness of his actions.
[edit] Boltri
"Hey, mom and dad were second cousins! That's totally and perfectly legal."
"Second cousins? Isn't that what you call brother and sister?"
"I'm gonna make this slow and painful." - Boltri, being insulted by Rogir
Official Spriggs Information
Specialties: Explosives, Death, and Human Culture
No one knows if Boltri was dropped on his head at birth, or if he was merely irradiated, but something was definitely wrong with him as a child. Almost from birth, he had a destructive streak that rivaled may small destroyers, with an evil sense of humor that occasionally left grunts on fire and dancing in circles. None the less, since his intelligence otherwise seemed in tact, he was trained in Earth culture to assist the Covenant in destroying their hated enemies.
Talked into stealing the Cruiser by his older brother Rotri, he's had nothing but fun as time went on, learning more and more about human culture and how to kill them.
[edit] Major Characters
(Incomplete)
[edit] Minor Characters
(Incomplete)
[edit] Running Jokes
(Incomplete)
